Mean Girls

Mean Girls quotes

179 total quotes (ID: 381)

Burn Book
External links:
Kevin Gnapoor
Mr. Duvall
Mrs. George
Multiple Characters

Soooo....what is up? Whats the 411? What has everybody been up to? What's the hot gossip? Tell me everything. What have you guys been listening to? What are the cool jams?

Crying Girl: [reading from paper] I wish we could all get along like we used to in middle school... I wish I could bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy...
[about to cry]
Damian: [shouting from back] She doesn't even go here!
Ms. Norbury: Do you even go to this school?
Crying Girl: No... I just have a lot of feelings...

Jason: Is your muffin buttered?
Cady: What?
Jason: Would you like us to assign someone to butter your muffin?
Cady: My what?
Regina: Is he bothering you? Jason, why are you such a skeaze?
Jason: I'm just being friendly.
Gretchen: [whispers] You were supposed to call me last night!
Regina: Jason, you do not come to a party at my house with Gretchen and then scam on some poor innocent girl right in front of us three days later. She's not interested. Do you want to have sex with him?
Cady: No, thank you.
Regina: Good. So it's settled. So you can go shave your back now. Bye, Jason.
Jason: [whispers] Bitch...

Cady: Oh, God...
Janis: You dirty little liar!
Cady: I'm sorry, I can explain.
Janis: Explain what? How you forgot to invite us to your "cool party"?
Damian: Janis, I cannot stop this car. I have a curfew.
Cady: You know I couldn't invite you! I had to pretend to be plastic!
Janis: But you're not pretending anymore! You're plastic! Cold, shiny, hard plastic!
Damian: Curfew, 1 a.m., it is now 1:10.
Janis: Did you have an awesome time? Did you drink awesome shooters, listen to awesome music, and just sit around and soak up each others' awesomeness?
Cady: You know what? You're the one who made me like this so you could use me for your eighth grade revenge!
Janis: God! See, at least me and Regina George know we're mean! But you try to act so innocent like, "Oh, I use to live in Africa with all the little birdies, and the little monkeys!"
Cady: You know what! It's not my fault you're like, in love with me, or something!
Janis: What?
Damian [abruptly stops the car]: Oh no she did not!
Janis: See, that's the thing with you Plastics, you think everyone's in love with you, but in realitly, everyone *hates* you, like Aaron Samuels for example! He broke up with Regina and guess what, he still doesn't want you, Cady! So why are you still messing with Regina? I'll tell you why, because you are a mean girl, you're a bitch! Here, you can have this, it won a prize.
[Damian drives away with Janis, yelling out the window]
Damian: And I want my pink shirt back! I WANT MY PINK SHIRT BACK!

Gretchen: Regina, we have to talk to you.
Regina: Is butter a carb?
Cady: Yes.
Gretchen: Regina, you're wearing sweatpants. It's Monday.
Regina: So...?
Karen: So that's against the rules, and you can't sit with us.
Regina: Whatever. Those rules aren't real.
Karen: They were real that day I wore a vest!
Regina: Because that vest was disgusting!
Gretchen: You can't sit with us!
Regina: [pause] These sweatpants are all that fit me right now.
Regina: [after being ignored] Fine. You can walk home, bitches!

Regina George, She is the nastiest skank bitch I have ever met. Do not trust her, she is a fugly slut.

[standing in front of chalkboard, holding a pointer] Regina George is an evil dictator. How do you overthrow an evil dictator? You take away her resources. She would be nothing without her high-status man-candy [points to first line on chalkboard, which reads Aaron Samuels], technically good physique, [points to second line: "Hot" body], and evil band of loyal followers [points to third line: Army of Skanks].

Regina: Oh my God, I love your skirt! Where did you get it?
Lea Edwards: It was my mom's in the '80s.
Regina: Vintage, so adorable.
Lea Edwards: Thanks.
Regina: [after girl walks away] That is the ugliest effing skirt I've ever seen.

Cady: Hey!
Regina: Why were you talking to Janis Ian?
Cady: I don't know, I mean, she's so weird, she just came up to me and started talking to me about crack.
Regina: She's so pathetic. Let me tell you something about Janis Ian. We were best friends in middle school. I know, right? It's so embarrassing. I don't even... whatever. So then in eighth grade, I started going out with my first boyfriend, Kyle, who was totally gorgeous. But then he moved to Indiana, and Janis was like, weirdly jealous of him. Like, if I would blow her off to hang out with Kyle, she'd be like "Why didn't you call me back?". And I'd be like "Why are you so obsessed with me?". So then, for my birthday party, which was an all-girls pool party, I was like "Janis, I can't invite you because I think you're a lesbian". I mean, I couldn't have a lesbian at my party. There were gonna be girls there in their bathing suits. I mean, right? She was a lesbian. So then her mom called my mom and started yelling at her, it was so retarded. And then she dropped out of school because no one would talk to her, and she came back in the fall for high school, all of her hair was cut off and she was totally weird, and now I guess she's on crack.

Cady: You're not stupid, Karen.
Karen: No, I am actually. I'm failing almost everything.
Cady: Well... there must be something you're good at.
Karen: I can stick my whole fist in my mouth. Wanna see?
Cady: No no no... Anything else?
Karen: Well... I'm kinda psychic. I have a fifth sense.
Cady: What do you mean?
Karen: It's like I have ESPN or something. My breasts can always tell when it's going to rain.
Cady: Really? That's amazing.
Karen: Well... they can tell when it's raining.

[in her English class essay, after being humiliated by Regina] Why should Caesar get to stomp around like a giant, while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet? What's so great about Caesar? Hm? Brutus is just as cute as Caesar. Brutus is just as smart as Caesar. (starts talking quickly) People totally like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar. And when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody, huh? Because that's not what Rome is about. We should totally just STAB Caesar!

Gretchen: Oh my God, there's Jason! *gasp* And he's with Taylor Wedell!
Karen: I heard they're going out.
Regina: Wait, Jason's not going out with, he cannot blow you off like that. He is such a little skeaze. Give me your phone.
Gretchen: You're not going to call him, right?
Regina: Do you think I'm an idiot?
Regina: [dials phone] Wedell on South Boulevard.
Gretchen: Caller ID!
Regina: Not when you connect from information.
Taylor's Mom: Hello?
Regina: Hi, may I please speak to Taylor Wedell?
Taylor's Mom: She's not in right now, whose calling?
Regina: Oh, this is Susan from Planned Parenthood. I have her test results, if you could have her give me a call as soon as she can, it's urgent, thank you. [Taylor's mom faints] She's not going out with anyone.
Gretchen: Okay, that was so fetch.

Janis: Regina George... How do I begin to explain Regina George?
Emma Gerber: Regina George is flawless.
Lea Edwards: She has two Fendi purses and a silver Lexus.
Mathlete Tim Pak: I hear her hair's insured for $10,000.
Amber D'Alessio: I hear she does car commercials... in Japan.
Kristen Hadley: Her favorite movie is Varsity Blues.
Short Girl: One time she met John Stamos on a plane.
Jessica Lopez: - and he told her she was pretty.
Bethany Byrd: One time she punched me in the face... it was awesome.

Bethany Byrd: Somebody wrote in that book that I'm lying about being a virgin because I use super jumbo tampons... but I can't help it if I've got a heavy flow and a wide set vagina!
Mr. Duvall: ... yeah, I can't do this.

Trang Pak is a grotsky little biatch...Trang Pak made out with Coach Carr.