Hassan: [Talking about a story Amir wrote] Why did he kill his wife?
Amir: Because he would cry and his tears would turn into pearls.
Hassan: But why didn't he smell an onion? (Long Pause) Amir: Would you eat dirt if I asked you to do that?
Hassan: If you would ask it I would. [pause]
But you would not ask that, would you?
Amir: Of course not. Hassan: I like Charles Bronson. Maybe someday we'll go to Iran.
Amir: Why?
Hassan: Maybe we'd see him somewhere. I could get his autograph.
Amir: Charles Bronson's not Iranian.
Hassan: He's not? So why does he speak Farsi with an Iranian accent? Amir: Baba, have you ever thought about getting new servants?
Baba: Why would I ever want to do that?
Amir: [already regretting it] I guess you wouldn't. It was just a question.
Baba: I grew up with Ali. My father took him in, he loved Ali like his own son. Forty years Ali's been with my family. Forty goddamn years. And you think I'm just going to throw him out? I've never laid a hand on you, Amir, but you ever say that again... You bring me shame. And Hassan... Hassan's not going anywhere. Do you understand? I SAID, DO YOU UNDERSTAND?! Baba: Are you ready for your birthday present?
Hassan: Is it a drawing book?
Baba: Better!
Hassan: A toy gun?
Baba: Better! Baba: Where are you from?
Dr. Starobin: I grew up in Michigan. Came out here for medical school. Once you get used to that California sunshine...
Baba: But your family?
Dr. Starobin: My family? We're originally from Russia. [Baba shoves him away, and is next seen with an Arabic doctor.] Baba: My son, the college graduate.
Amir: It's just community college.
Baba: It's college. And someday, Dr. Amir! [Amir is on the phone with Rahim Khan]
Rahim Khan: You should come home.
Amir: Home? I don't think now's such a good time.
Rahim Khan: It is a very bad time, but you should come. Soraya: What do you see?
Amir: The rest of my life. Assef: You want my advice? Run away. That's what you do best.
Amir: Not without Sohrab. Amir: Do you remember what these streets smelled like in the old days?
Farid: Kabob.
Amir: Lamb kabob.
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