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Jerry Maguire

Jerry Maguire quotes

61 total quotes

Dicky Fox
Dorothy Boyd
Jerry Maguire
Laurel Boyd
Multiple Characters
Rod Tidwell




View Quote Dorothy: Maybe I am taking advantage. Am I a bad person? All I know is that I found someone who was charming and popular and not-so-nice to me -- and he died. Okay? So why should I let this guy go, when everything in my body says this one is the one.
Laurel: Easy, hon, I was just looking for fun details --
Dorothy: Oh, well, why didn't you say so? And oh, I don't know if you're interested in this detail, but I was just about to tell you that I love him. I love him, and I don't care what you think. I love him for the man he wants to be, and I love him for the man he almost is. I love him.
View Quote Jerry: Can I ask you a question totally unrelated to your career?
Rod: Oh, we gonna be friends now?
Jerry: What do you know about dating a single mother?
Rod: Oh I know plenty. I was raised by a single mother.
Jerry: Tell me, because it's been a month, and she's about to take another job in San Diego.
Rod: First, single mothers don't "date." They have been to the circus, you know what I'm saying? They have been to the puppet show and they have seen the strings. You love her?
Jerry: How do I know?
Rod: You know when you know. It makes you shiver, it eats at your insides. You know?
Jerry: No, I don't know.
Rod: Then you gotta have The Talk.
Jerry: But I sure don't like that she's leaving.
Rod: Well, that ain't fair to her. A single mother, that's a sacred thing, man.
Jerry: The kid is amazing.
Rod: No. A real man does not shoplift the "pooty" from a single mom.
Jerry: I didn't "shoplift the pooty." We were thrown together and -- I mean it's two mutual people who -- Alright, I shoplifted the pooty.
Rod: Shame on you. SHAME on you.
View Quote Jerry: Hello. I'm looking for my wife. Alright. If this is where it has to happen, then this is where it has to happen. I'm not letting you get rid of me. How about that? This used to be my specialty. I was good in a living room. Send me in there, I'll do it alone. And now I just... I don't know...but our little company had a good night tonight. A really big night. But it wasn't complete, it wasn't nearly close to being in the same vicinity as complete, because I couldn't share it with you. I couldn't hear your voice, or laugh about it with you. I missed my wife. We live in a cynical world, and we work in a business of tough competitors, I love you. You complete me. And I just...
Dorothy: Shut up. Just shut up. You had me at hello.
View Quote Jerry: I started talking with Dennis Wilburn about your renegotation.
Rod: Talking. Jerry Rice, Andre Reed, Chris Carter... I smoke all these fools. They are making the big sweet dollars. They are making the... kwan, and you are talking.
Jerry: Kwan. That's your word?
Rod: Yeah, man, it means love, respect, community... and the dollars too. The whole package. The kwan.
Jerry: Great word. Towel?
Rod: No, I air-dry.
Jerry: Rod, I say this with great respect, but those players you mentioned are marquee players...
Rod: Marquee?!?
Jerry: Here's what I'm saying. This is a renegotiation. We want more from them, so let's show them more from us. Let's show them your pure joy of the game, let's bury the attitude a little, let's show them --
Rod: You're telling me to dance.
Jerry: No, I'm saying to be --
Rod: "Love me love me love me... put me on t.v." That's the iconography of rascism, man!
Jerry: Rod, I'm not a rascist. I'm telling you to be the best version of you, to get back to the guy who first started playing this game. Way back when you were a kid. It wasn't just about the money, was it?...Was it?
Rod: Do your job, man, don't tell me to dance.
Jerry: Fine. Fine. Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine.
Rod: I'm an athlete, not an entertainer. These are the ABC's of ME. Get it? I do not dance.
View Quote Jerry: I'm Jerry Maguire.
Laurel: You seem just the way I pictured you. I'm her disapproving sister Laurel.
Jerry: Honesty. Thank you.
View Quote Jerry: Rod! How ya doing? Jerry Maguire.
Rod: "How am I doing?" I'll tell you. I'm sweatin, dude! That's how I'm "doin." I'm sweatin my contract. I'm sweatin' Bob Sugar calling and telling me I'm blowing the big endorsements if I stay with you. I'm sweatin'. You hear what I'm saying?
Jerry: I hear what you're saying...
Rod: No. I hear that you hear what I'm saying. But do you hear what I'm saying?
...
Rod: Alright, we're just getting started on my list of things you need to know. Take notes if you want to.
Jerry: Okay.
Rod: Good, 'cause see, I am a valuable commodity. I go across the middle. I see the ball and a dude coming right at me, wanting to kill me, I tell my brain "get killed, catch the ball." That's New York Steak, baby. Rare. And yet, nobody's giving me LOVE. Nobody's giving me PROPS. Nobody. I went to Arizona State, I'm from Arizona, I break Arizona records, I'm a Sun Devil, man!!!
Jerry: Now you want Arizona dollars.
Rod: Exactly. And I'm sitting here with an ant problem, look! And my brother Tee Pee's room is flooded with water. The house is fallin' apart, we don't even know where we're gonna live in a year, and I'm supposed to be a "superstar," man! Are you catching my flow, here?
Jerry: I need a decision from you, Rod.
...
Rod: Now to recap, I want to stay in Arizona. I want my new contract. I like you, you're nice to my wife.
Jerry: That's that's great. I'm really... happy.
Rod: Are you listenin'?
Jerry: Yes!
Rod: This is what I'm gonna do for you: God bless you, Jerry. But this is what you gonna do for me, Jerry?
Jerry: Yeah, what can I do for you, Rod? You just tell me what can I do for you?
Rod: It's something very personal, a very important thing. Hell! It's a family motto. Are you ready Jerry? I wanna make sure you're ready, brother. Here it is: Show me the money. SHOW! ME! THE! MONEY! Jerry, it is such a pleasure to say that! Say it with me one time, Jerry.
Jerry: Show you the money.
Rod: No, no. You can do better than that! I want you to say it brother with meaning! Hey, I got Bob Sugar on the other line I bet you he can say it!
Jerry: Ye, ye, no, no, no. Show you the money.
Rod: No! Not show you! Show me the money!
Jerry: Show me the money!
Rod: Yeah! Louder!
Jerry: Show me the money!
Rod: I need to feel you Jerry!
Jerry: Show me the money! Show me the money!
Rod: I love black people.
Jerry: I love black people!
Rod: Who's your mother****er, Jerry?
Jerry: You're my mother ****er! Show me the money!
Rod: Uh! Congratulations, you're still my agent. Note: the bolded line is ranked #25 in the American Film Institute's list of the top 100 movie quotations in American cinema.
View Quote Jerry: The ****in zoo is closed, Ray.
Ray: You said "****."
Jerry: Uh... yeah... I...
Ray: Don't worry. I won't tell.
View Quote Jerry: This is going to change everything.
Dorothy: Promise?
View Quote Ray: D'you know that the human head weighs 8 pounds?
Jerry: Did you know that Troy Aikman, in only six years, has passed for 16,303 yards?
Ray: D'you know that bees and dogs can smell fear?
Jerry: Did you know that the career record for hits is 4,256 by Pete Rose who is NOT in the Hall of Fame?
Ray: D'you know that my next door neighbor has three rabbits?
Jerry: I... I can't compete with that!
View Quote Ray: What's wrong, mom?
Dorothy: First class is what's wrong. It used to be a better meal. Now it's a better life.
View Quote Rod: I'm gonna have the game of my life on Monday Night Football, and show all these mother****ers.
Jerry: Take care, okay? You're my entire client roster.
Rod: Don't I know it. Now go home to your wife.
Jerry: What's that supposed to mean?
Rod: Why are you even here, man? You could have told me all this over the phone.
Jerry: I don't know -- how's "dedication" for an answer?
Rod: You don't want to go home, do you?
Jerry: Why are you doing this to me, Rod?
Rod: I'm asking you a question --
Jerry: No, you're --
Rod: I'm trying to talk to you. How's your marriage?
Jerry: Not everyone has what you have.
Rod: Why'd you get married? I'm asking you as a friend.
Jerry: You're jabbing at me.
Rod: I'm sorry I asked.
Jerry: No, I'm going to answer you. You want an answer? I'll give it to you. Loyalty. She was loyal. Everything grew from there.
Rod: That's an answer.
Jerry: Damn right.
Rod: For loyalty, you buy a dog. For love, you get married.
Jerry: Look. I'm happy to entertain you, as always, but I have a question for you. Are we really "friends?"
Rod: Why not --
Jerry: Well, friends can tell each other anything, right? If we have our "friends" hats on --
Rod: I think so.
Jerry: Alright. Here's why you don't have your ten million dollars yet. You are a paycheck player. You play with your head. Not your heart. In your personal life? Heart. But when you get on the field -- you're a businessman. It's wide-angle lenses and who ****ed you over and who owes you for it. That's not what inspires people. I'm sorry, but that's the truth, can you handle it? Just a "question," Rod. Between friends.
Rod: I don't want to be friends anymore.
Jerry: Fine.
Rod: Beautiful.
View Quote Rod: Tell me what to do, Jerry. You tell me to eat lima beans, I'll eat lima beans. If you say take the shitty deal, that's all we can get --
Marcee: "All we can get?"
Rod: Can I SPEAK with my agent here?
Marcee: You know what you're qonna do, Rodney. You're gonna reject this shitty contract. You're gonna play out your existing shitty contract and go be a free agent next year and the hell with Arizona. This is us, and we determine our worth. You're a fine, proud, surviving, splendid black man.
Rod: Honey, you are just -- the shit.
Jerry: If you get injured, you get nothing.
Rod: Won't happen. I'm strong in my mind.
Jerry: It's a risk.
Rod: Bet on me, dude. Bet on me like I bet on you.
View Quote Rod: You never had The Talk, did you?
Jerry: No.
Rod: Well, this was another way to go.
View Quote Sugar: I came here to let you go.
Jerry: Pardon me?
Sugar: Came here to fire you, Jerry. It's real, Jerry. You... you should say something.
Jerry: Aw shit...the crowded restaurant... so there's no scene...
Sugar: I know. It sucks. I suck.
Jerry: You...
Sugar: You did this to yourself. You said "fewer clients." You put it all on paper. Scully was very upset. Heart attacks make some people sweeter, but not him. You did this to yourself -- although I do gotta hand it to you. For about five minutes you had everyone applauding smaller revenues.
Jerry: You... ungrateful... unctuous...
Sugar: ... dick?
Jerry: Dick.
Sugar: Give me a little credit for doing this face-to-face! What I went through knowing I was going to do this to my mentor! Can you get past yourself for a second?
Jerry: You'll lose.
Sugar: You wanted smaller.
Jerry: I'm over it. Now I want all my clients and yours too.
Sugar: Jerry --
Jerry: -- and I'll get 'em.
Sugar: You'll always be my hero, Jerry. Always always always. We're bringing other elements in, we're focusing on endorsements -- it's not about handholding anymore. We're no longer babysitters.
View Quote Tyson: [pointing to Rod on the TV] That's my mofo!
Marcee: Why don't you be the first man in your family not to say that word? And then we'll let you live.