Heathers

Heathers quotes

79 total quotes (ID: 272)

Heather Chandler
Heather Duke
J.D.
Multiple Characters
Veronica Sawyer


Great pate, mom, but I gotta motor if I wanna be ready for that party.


You were nothing before you met me. You were playing Barbies with Betty Finn. You were a Bluebird. You were a Brownie. You were a Girl Scout Cookie.

Dear diary, my teen-angst bullshit now has a body count. Everybody's sad...but it's kind of a weird kind of sad. Suicide gave Heather depth, Kurt a soul, and Ram a brain. I don't know what it's given me, but I have no control over myself when I'm with J.D. Are we going to prom or to hell?

Pauline Fleming: I think it's a good opportunity to share the... feelings that this suicide has spurred in all of us. Now, who would like to begin?
Tracey: I heard it was really gnarly. She sucked down a bowl of multi-purpose deodorizing disinfectant, and then SMASH.
Pauline Fleming: Now Tracey, let's not rehash the coroner's report. Let's talk emotions.

It's one thing to want someone out of your life, but it's another thing to serve them a wake-up cup full of Liquid Drano.

I can't believe you did it. I was teasing. I loved you. Course, I was coming up here to kill ya...

Chaos was what killed the dinosaurs, darling.

This isn't just a spoke in my menstrual cycle.

I say we just grow up, be adults and die.

Seven schools in seven states and the only thing different is my locker combination.

Grow up, Heather, bulimia is so '87.

Veronica: You can't use that knife. That knife is filthy.
J.D.: What do you think I'm going to do with it, take out her tonsils?
Veronica: Excuse me, I think I know Heather a little bit better than you do. If she were going to slit her wrists, the knife would be spotless.

You know what I want, babe? *shoots J.D.* Cool guys like you out of my life.

I like it. It's got that it's-a-cruel-world-let's-throw-ourselves-in-the-abyss type ambience.

[J.D. shows Heather pictures]
Heather Duke: Me and Martha Dumptruck? Where did you get this?
J.D.: I just had the nicest little chat with Ms. Dumptruck. Got along famously. It's kind of scary that everyone's got a little story to tell. You wanna see the canoeing shots?
Heather Duke: What is this? Blackmail? [pause] I'll give you a week's lunch money.
J.D.: I don't want your money. I want your strength. Westerburg does not need mushy togetherness. It needs a strong leader. Heather Chandler was that leader but...
Heather Duke: But she couldn't handle it.
J.D.: I think you can. Moby Dick is dunked. The white whale drank some bad plankton and splashed through a coffee table and now it's your turn to take the helm.
Heather Duke: What about the photographs?
J.D.: Oh, don't worry. I'll ask you to do me a favor. That will be one you'll enjoy. Then you'll get the negatives and everything back then. But in the meantime... strength. Here's a little gift. From Heather to Heather. [gives her Heather Chandler's red hair bow]