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Jeff quotes

View Quote Do you need a stuffed animal? I have a dog. I think I have a bear. Yeah, I have a bear.
View Quote I can't believe you came on my mom. You might be the biggest perv in the world right now.
View Quote My roommates said they'd get me rims for christmas. And a CB Radio so I can talk to other car beds.
View Quote I'll run over your attitude, It sucks.
View Quote Line up you ****in' nerds. Who's wants a shot at the champ!?
View Quote Hi, I'm Jeff. I have a bush too - it's not grey.
View Quote What's goin' on, shitlips?
View Quote Whats up Douche Bigelow?
View Quote You're dead to me, over.
View Quote [sigh] I shoulda' worn a condom.
View Quote That's great Bobby, but we don't have Dance Dance Revolution, so you're - dumb.
View Quote Nice karma, Guy-Blow.
View Quote I have to pee out of my ass.
View Quote [to Grace] So, i mean, what's it like being old? It's gotta be weird, right? I mean, you saw a lotta stuff go down. World War I, World War II, the automobile, Tupac, i mean... [GRACE: I once gave Charlie Chaplain a hand job] Noo way! Was he silent?
View Quote Wassup, Silver Fox?
View Quote Oh, I started a fight club.
View Quote Shit's weak! Shit's weak! Wizzeak!
View Quote Hey, look! It's Bono's brother.
View Quote Yea.. but it's a ****ing sweet car!
View Quote [Mimicking J.P.] My name is JP. I am a robot. I like robots. I have a robot vagina.
View Quote Let's do it—The levels I mean, not sex.
View Quote Uh-oh? What does that mean? High score? Is that bad? Did I break it?
View Quote That's cool.....if you wanna be sober and vomit.
View Quote Dude, wanking off on my mom is one thing, but doing your grandma...Thats legendary!
View Quote Do you have bathrooms here, or do i have to shit in a plant?
View Quote Ok... so who wants to hear about my STD from the silent film era? Yeah, put your hands up for that one. This chick's pussy smelled like the Great Depression.
View Quote Good news from the party........Barry sucked on his first boobie! (Barry: For thirteen hours!)
View Quote Dude, we were just kidding JP. (mimicking JP's Robot voice) Dont be mad at us!
View Quote Hey Samantha, don't take the red pill!
View Quote Let's ****ing rage!
View Quote Who wants to hear about my blowjob from the World War? Yeah...(said like a news anchor) "A little Hiroshima on my balls".
View Quote Who wants to know what Jackie Gleason's balls tasted like? Yes, Cornbread.
View Quote Fruitcup? Nice....way to go mom!
View Quote Hello........Cool i hope its a naked dude with a boner.
View Quote I love my turtle.
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