Mark's Mom: Oh, guys, don't stay in here all day. I had to take the batteries out of the carbon monoxide detector. It was beeping all night.
Dr. Cohen: You know, our bodies are capable of doing some very funny things when they're consumed by stress and anxiety. I found my ex-best friend's cufflinks in my wife's purse. I couldn't get an erection for a year and a half...for example.
Tim: By the way, it says "Balls" on your face.
Andrew: [to Mark] Asshole.
Mark: My mom did it.
Jesse: Dude, maybe you should stay over by the steps. I don't know CPR.
Mark: You look like a wet beaver.
Diego: Who just saw some titties?
[Mark, Largeman and Sam raise their hands tentatively]
Diego: Ok. Now everybody calm the **** down!
  »   More Quotes from
  »   More Quotes from
  »   Back to the