Mr Jones: Craig!
Craig: What?
Mr Jones: Come in here!
[Craig enters bathroom, Mr Jones is spraying air freshener] Craig: Aw man, I'll wait until you come out.
Mr Jones: Boy, bring yo ass up in here! What you talkin 'bout, you 'wait til I come out'? I smelt yo shit for 22 years...now you can smell mine for 5 minutes.
...Urgh! [plop] Mr Jones: Now your mama told me what happened to you yesterday.
Craig: ...Wha?...
Mr Jones: That was stupid! ...How the hell you gonna get fired...on your day off?!
Craig: I don't know.
...Urrrgh! [plop] Mr Jones: Well, you need a trade. Look at that there, over there on the C-C-...urrrgh!...on the counter there. Ughh.
Craig: ...I ain't tryna be no dog-catcher!
Mr Jones: Why not?
Craig: I don't even like dogs.
Mr Jones: That's the beauty of it! I-I grab a dog...and...I-I choke him, and I-I...kick the shit out of him! All day long - my foot up a dog's ass! Yes, BANG BANG BANG up his ass! ...That's my plea-sure!
Craig: ...No thanks.
Mr Jones: Well, I'll tell you one thing. Round here, you go to work, you go to school. First of the month - the rent is due. If you ain't got nothin on the table, you ain't gotta worry about catchin a dog. You gotta worry about a dog...catchin YOUR ass!
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