Fletch

Fletch quotes

45 total quotes (ID: 222)

Fletch


Can I call my mother? Tell her how much I love her?


For another grand, I'll let you take me out to dinner.

Hey that's you and Tommy Lasorda... [smashes picture] I hate Tommy Lasorda.

Hey! I think all of our problems may have just been solved. Ed McMahon. Think I just won a million bucks. Yeahhahhah, Irwin M. Fletcher you choose. Woo wee! Oh boy, I lost. Again. Sorry.

Hey, don't talk to me that way, assface. I don't work for you yet.

I didn't want to do this, but I'm afraid I'm gonna have to pull rank on you. I'm with the Mattress Police. There are no tags on these mattresses.

I would have been here sooner, but a manure-spreader jackknifed on the Santa Ana. Gawdawful mess. You should see my shoes.

If you haven't guessed, there's been a lot of drug traffic on the beach lately. And I'm not talking about Robitussin and No-Doz...I'm talking about the hard stuff. I've been posing as an affable, minor league junkie in order to get to the bottom of it. It hasn't been easy. I don't shower much.

In the court ruling US vs. Fishbine, a man subjected to potential incineration while wearing another man's suit is entitled to $10,000 worth of airline tickets. It's an obscure ruling, but a very important one. To me.

It was something your wife said while we were in bed together. She said we had the same build. From the waist up I imagine.

Love your body, Larry.

Mr. Stanwyk's parents Marvin and Velma of Provo, were unable to attend the wedding. Those are three names I enjoy; Marvin, Velma, and Provo.

Oh, you've remodeled the garage. Must have cost you hundreds.

Tierra Del Fuego.

You know, if you shoot me, you're liable to lose a lot of those humanitarian awards.