Fargo quotes
61 total quotes (ID: 202)Multiple Characters
Opening Text
Wade Gustafson
Mike Yanagita: She fought real hard, Margie
Mike Yanagita: She had...leukemia
Mike Yanagita: So ya went and married Norm Son-of-a-Gunderson!
Mike Yanagita: Well, as an engineer you could do a lot worse
Mike Yanagita: Well, that's nothing compared to your accomplishments.
Mike Yanagita: Ya know, it's the Radisson, so it's pretty good.
Mike Yanagita: You're such a Supa Lady!!
Scottie Lundegard: There's no fucking way....
Shep Proudfoot: [beating Carl violently] Fucking little weasel! Fuck you! You fucking motherfucker son of a bitch Jesus Christ you fucking shitbag motherfucker!
Attendant: Hi.
Carl: Yeah, I decided not to park here.
Attendant: What do you mean? You decided not to park here?
Carl: Yeah, I just came in. I decided not to park here.
Attendant: You, uh--I'm sorry, sir, but--
Carl: I decided not to--I'm, uh, not taking the trip as it turns out.
Attendant: I'm sorry, sir, we do have to charge you the four dollars.
Carl: I just pulled in here. I just fuckin' pulled in here!
Attendant: Well, see, there's a minimum charge of four dollars. Long-term parking charges by the day.
Carl: I guess you think, ya know, you're some kind of an authority figure. With that stupid fucking uniform. Huh, buddy? King Clip-on Tie here. Big fucking man, huh? You know, these are the limits of your life, man. Ruler of your little fucking gate here. There's your four dollars, you pathetic piece of shit.
Carl: Yeah, I decided not to park here.
Attendant: What do you mean? You decided not to park here?
Carl: Yeah, I just came in. I decided not to park here.
Attendant: You, uh--I'm sorry, sir, but--
Carl: I decided not to--I'm, uh, not taking the trip as it turns out.
Attendant: I'm sorry, sir, we do have to charge you the four dollars.
Carl: I just pulled in here. I just fuckin' pulled in here!
Attendant: Well, see, there's a minimum charge of four dollars. Long-term parking charges by the day.
Carl: I guess you think, ya know, you're some kind of an authority figure. With that stupid fucking uniform. Huh, buddy? King Clip-on Tie here. Big fucking man, huh? You know, these are the limits of your life, man. Ruler of your little fucking gate here. There's your four dollars, you pathetic piece of shit.
Attendant: May I have your ticket--[He sees Carl's bloody face] Please?
Carl: Open the fucking gate!
Carl: Open the fucking gate!
Carl: [about his face] You should see the other guy. [He sees Jean slumped to the floor, dead] The fuck happened to her?
Grimsrud: She started shrieking, ya know.
Carl: Jesus. Oh. Well, I got the money. All of it. All eighty grand. Forty for you, forty for me. That's it, then. Here are the keys to my truck. I'm takin' the Sierra.
Grimsrud: We split that.
Carl: How the fuck do ya split a fuckin' car, ya dummy? With a fuckin' chainsaw?
Grimsrud: One of us pays the other for half.
Carl: Hold on. No fuckin' way. You fuckin' notice this?! I got fuckin' shot. I got fuckin' shot in the face! I went and got the fuckin' money! I got shot fuckin' pickin' it up! I've been up for thirty-six fuckin' hours! I'm takin' that fuckin' car! That fucker's mine, ya fuckin' asshole. Ya know, I've been listenin' to your fuckin' bullshit all week. Are we square?! Are we square? Yeah, ya fuckin' mute. And if you see your friend Shep Proudfoot, tell him I'm gonna nail his fuckin' ass!
Grimsrud: She started shrieking, ya know.
Carl: Jesus. Oh. Well, I got the money. All of it. All eighty grand. Forty for you, forty for me. That's it, then. Here are the keys to my truck. I'm takin' the Sierra.
Grimsrud: We split that.
Carl: How the fuck do ya split a fuckin' car, ya dummy? With a fuckin' chainsaw?
Grimsrud: One of us pays the other for half.
Carl: Hold on. No fuckin' way. You fuckin' notice this?! I got fuckin' shot. I got fuckin' shot in the face! I went and got the fuckin' money! I got shot fuckin' pickin' it up! I've been up for thirty-six fuckin' hours! I'm takin' that fuckin' car! That fucker's mine, ya fuckin' asshole. Ya know, I've been listenin' to your fuckin' bullshit all week. Are we square?! Are we square? Yeah, ya fuckin' mute. And if you see your friend Shep Proudfoot, tell him I'm gonna nail his fuckin' ass!
Carl: [after Grimsrud shoots the police officer] Whoa! Whoa, daddy.
Grimsrud: You'll take care of it. You are smooth, smooth, you know. Just clean him of the road.
Grimsrud: You'll take care of it. You are smooth, smooth, you know. Just clean him of the road.
Carl: Hey, look at that. Twin Cities. That's the IDS Building, the big glass one. Tallest skyscraper in the Midwest - after the uh, Sears, in, uh, Chicago, or John Hancock Building, whatever. You ever been to Minneapolis?
Grimsrud: Nope.
Carl: Would it kill you to say something?
Grimsrud: I did.
Carl: "No." That's the first thing you've said in the last four hours. That's a, that's a fountain of conversation, man. That's a geyser. I mean, whoa, daddy, stand back, man. Shit. You know I'm sittin' here drivin', doin' all the drivin', man, the whole fuckin' way from Brainerd, drivin', just tryin' to chat, you know, keep our spirits up, fight the boredom of the road, and you can't say one fuckin' thing just in the way of conversation? Well, fuck it. I don't have to talk either, man. See how you like it. [Pause] Just total fuckin' silence. Two can play at that game, smart guy. We'll just see how you like it. Total silence.
Grimsrud: Nope.
Carl: Would it kill you to say something?
Grimsrud: I did.
Carl: "No." That's the first thing you've said in the last four hours. That's a, that's a fountain of conversation, man. That's a geyser. I mean, whoa, daddy, stand back, man. Shit. You know I'm sittin' here drivin', doin' all the drivin', man, the whole fuckin' way from Brainerd, drivin', just tryin' to chat, you know, keep our spirits up, fight the boredom of the road, and you can't say one fuckin' thing just in the way of conversation? Well, fuck it. I don't have to talk either, man. See how you like it. [Pause] Just total fuckin' silence. Two can play at that game, smart guy. We'll just see how you like it. Total silence.
Carl: Who the fuck are you? Who the fuck are you?!
Wade: I've got your damn money now where's my dauguter?
Carl: I am through fuckin' around. Drop that fuckin' briefcase!
Wade: Where's my daughter?
Carl: Fuck you man! Where's Jerry? I gave simple fuckin' instructions.
Wade: Where's my damn daughter? No Jean, no money!
Carl: Drop that fucking money!
Wade: No Jean, no money!
Carl: Is this a fuckin' joke here?! [Carl pulls out his gun and shoots Wade] Happy now, asshole?! What's with you people?! Ya fucking imbeciles!
[Wade shoots Carl in the cheek]
Carl: Fuckin' shot me!
Wade: I've got your damn money now where's my dauguter?
Carl: I am through fuckin' around. Drop that fuckin' briefcase!
Wade: Where's my daughter?
Carl: Fuck you man! Where's Jerry? I gave simple fuckin' instructions.
Wade: Where's my damn daughter? No Jean, no money!
Carl: Drop that fucking money!
Wade: No Jean, no money!
Carl: Is this a fuckin' joke here?! [Carl pulls out his gun and shoots Wade] Happy now, asshole?! What's with you people?! Ya fucking imbeciles!
[Wade shoots Carl in the cheek]
Carl: Fuckin' shot me!