Lloyd quotes
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We got no food, we got no jobs, our pets' heads are fallin' off!!
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Life's a fragile thing Harry... One minute you're chewin on a burger, the next minute you're dead meat.
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Harry! You're alive! And you're a horrible shot!
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AH! Harry! Your hands are freezing!
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No way? Thats great! We landed on the moon!
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Harry, I took care of it.
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I got worms.
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Mary, I desperately want to make love to a schoolboy!
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So you're telling me there's a chance.
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Harry, I got some beef jer....
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How come I didn't get a dildo?
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Good bye my looooove!
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Find a happy place, find a happy place!
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It's okay, I'm a limo driver!
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Man, you are one pathetic loser! No offense.
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I was robbed by a sweet old lady on a motorized cart. I didn't even see it coming!
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I fell off the jetway again.
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Yea. He must work out.
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[after accidentally killing a mobster in a restaurant] Check, please!
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[dreaming that he's shooting Mary's husband] DIE!
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[To Harry] We're in a hole .. we're just gonna have to dig ourselves out
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(pretends to promote Turbo Lax) 1/2 teaspoon, for fast, effective relief.
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You know what I'm sick and tired of, Harry? I'm sick and tired of having to eek my way through life. I'm sick and tired of being a nobody. (pause) But most of all, I'm sick and tired of having nobody.
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I'll tell ya where we'll go. Someplace warm. A place where the beer flows like wine. And beautiful women instinctively flock like the salmon of Capistrano.