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Metatron quotes

View Quote Behold the Metatron! Herald of the Almighty and voice of the one true God!
View Quote Oh, give over, will you? I couldn't rape you if I wanted to. Angels are ill-equipped. (lowers his pants) See? I'm as anatomically impaired as a Ken doll. You bottom-feeders and your arrogance; you think everybody's just trying to get in your knickers.
View Quote I'm soaked, and she's the one that's surly. That's rich!
View Quote Do you go around drenching everybody that comes into your room with flame-****ant chemicals? No wonder you're single.
View Quote Metatron acts as the voice of God. Any do****ented occasion when some yahoo claims that God has spoken to them, they're speaking to me. Or they're talking to themselves.
View Quote You don't mind that I lost the wings, do you? I'm trying to keep our profile low.
View Quote Be who you've always been. Just be this as well, from time to time.
View Quote Oh, Bartleby. Was Wisconsin really that bad?
View Quote One of the drawbacks to being a martyr is that you have to die.
View Quote You tell someone you're a Metatron, they stare at you blankly. You mention something out of a Charlton Heston movie and suddenly everyone is a theology scholar, may I continue uninterrupted?
View Quote You people! If it hasn't been made into a movie, it's not worth knowing about, is that it?
View Quote The little stoner's got a point!
View Quote Anyone that isn't dead or from another plane of existence would do well to cover their ears right about now.
View Quote To answer that; human beings have neither the aural nor the psychological capacity to withstand the awesome power of God's true voice. Were you to hear it your mind would cave in and your heart would explode inside your chest. We went through five Adams before we figured that one out.
View Quote It never ends! {Wipes off coat with God's dress, then abruptly stops} Sorry.
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