Other quotes

Harry Ellis: Hey babe, I negotiate million dollar deals for breakfast. I think I can handle this Eurotrash.

Theo: [After a police Armored Personnel Carrier is blown-up by the terrorists] Oh my God, the quarterback is toast!

FBI Agent Johnson: I'm Agent Johnson, this is Special Agent Johnson. No relation.

Dwayne: [Watching as FBI helicopter is destroyed] We're gonna need some more FBI guys, I guess.

Theo: [Over the CB, as the police SWAT team closes in] Alright, listen up guys. 'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring — except for the four assholes coming in the rear in standard two-by-two cover formation.

Sgt. Al Powell: The man is hurting! He's alone, he's tired, he hasn't seen diddly squat from anyone down here... and you're going to stand there and tell me that he's going to give a damn about what you do to him, if he makes it out of there alive? Why don't you wake up and smell what you shovel'n?

Dwayne: [Watching as Hans Gruber falls to his death from the building] God, I hope that's not a hostage!

Special Agent Johnson: [on phone] Hello, this is Agent Johnson... No, the other one.

Businessman: You don't like flying, do you?
John: What gives you that idea?
Businessman: You want to know the secret to surviving air travel? After you get where you're going, take off your shoes and your socks then walk around on the rug bare foot and make fists with your toes.
John: Fists with your toes?
Businessman: I know, it sounds crazy. Trust me, I've been doing it for nine years. Yessir, better than a shower and a hot cup of coffee.
John: Okay.
[Businessman sees John's gun and reacts]
John: It's okay. I'm a cop. Trust me, I've been doing this for eleven years.

John: You throw quite a party. I didn't realize they celebrated Christmas in Japan.
Joseph Takagi: Hey, we're flexible. Pearl Harbor didn't work out so we got you with tape decks.

McClane: Mayday, Mayday, Emergency anyone copy, Channel Nine, terrorists have seized the Nakatomi Building, Century City, I repeat, unknown number of terrorists, six or more armed with automatic weapons on the thirtieth floor of Nakatomi Plaza.
LAPD Operator: (To other operator) I'll take this.
McClane: Somebody answer me, goddamn it!
LAPD Operator: (Over Radio) This freqency is reserved for emergency communications...
McClane: No ****ing shit, lady! Do I sound like I'm ordering a pizza!?

Convenience Store Clerk: I thought you guys just ate doughnuts.
Al: Heh. They're for my wife.
Clerk: [sarcastically] Yeah.
Al: She's pregnant.
Clerk: Yeah.
Al: Bag it.
Clerk: Big time.

Joseph: You want money? What kind of terrorists are you?
Hans: [laughs] Who said we were terrorists?

Holly: I have a request.
Hans: What idiot put you in charge?
Holly: You did. When you murdered my boss. Now everyone's looking to me. Personally, I'd pass on the job. I don't enjoy being this close to you.

Hans: I thought I told all of you, I want radio silence until further...
John: Ooooh, I'm very sorry Hans. I didn't get that memo. Maybe you should've put it on the bulletin board. I figured since I've waxed Tony and Marco and his friend here, I figured you and Karl and Franco might be a little lonely, so I decided to give you a call.
Hans: Eh, that's... very kind of you, considering you are a mysterious party crasher. You are most troublesome, for a security guard.
John: Bzzzt. Sorry Hans, wrong guess. Would you like to go for Double Jeopardy where the scores can really change?

Hans: Who are you then?
John: Just a fly in the ointment, Hans. The monkey in the wrench. The pain in the ass.

Hans: Mr. Mystery Guest? Are you still there?
John: Yeah, I'm still here. Unless you wanna open the front door for me.
Hans: Uh, no I'm afraid not. But you have me at a loss. You know my name but who are you? Just another American who saw too many movies as a child? Another orphan of a bankrupt culture who thinks he's John Wayne? Rambo? Marshall Dillon?
John: Was always kinda' partial to Roy Rogers actually. I really dig those sequined shirts.
Hans: Do you really think you have a chance against us, Mister Cowboy?
John: Yippee-ki-yay, mother****er.

Dwayne: We don't know shit, Powell. If there's hostages in there, how come no-one's come to us with ransom demands? If there's terrorists in there, where's their list of demands? All we know is that whoever shot your car up is probably the same silly son-of-a-bitch you've been talking to on that radio.
Al: Excuse me, sir! But what about the body that fell out the window?
Dwayne: Well who knows? Maybe some stockbroker — got depressed...

Al: In fact, I think he's a cop. Maybe not LAPD, but he's definitely a badge.
Dwayne: How do you know that?
Al: A hunch, things he said. Like being able to spot a phony ID.
Dwayne: Jesus Christ, Powell, he could be a ****ing bartender for all we know.

Hans: This time John Wayne does not walk off into the sunset with Grace Kelly.
John: That was Gary Cooper, asshole.

Holly: After all your posturing, all your speeches, you're nothing but a common thief.
Hans: I am an exceptional thief, Mrs. McClane. And since I'm moving up to kidnapping, you should be more polite.

Special Agent Johnson: Just like ****in' Saigon ain't it, Slick?
Agent Johnson: I was in junior high, dickhead.

Hans: Now, you can break the code...?
Theo: You didn't bring me along for my charming personality

Hans: Attention, Cowboy. Attention. Or should I call you Mr. McClane? Mr. Officer John McClane of the New York Police Department?
John: Sister Teresa called me Mr. McClane in the Third Grade. My friends call me John... and you're neither, shithead.

Ginny: Woah. That guy looks really pissed.
Holly: He's still alive.
Ginny: What?
Holly: Only John can drive somebody that crazy.

John: Is the building on fire?
Al: No, but it's gonna need a paint job and a shit load of screen doors.

Hans: You an American?
John: Only if New Jersey counts.

Dwayne: I got a hundred people down here and they're all covered in glass.
John: Glass? Who gives a shit about glass? Who the **** is this?
Dwayne: This is Deputy Chief Dwayne T. Robinson, and I am in charge here.
John: Oh you're in charge? Well I got news for you *Dwayne*, from up here it doesn't look like you're in charge of jack shit.
Dwayne: You listen to me you little asshole—!
John: Asshole? I'm not the one who just got butt-****ed on national TV, Dwayne!

Dwayne: The FBI is here, now?
Cop: Yes, sir, right over there.
Al: Want a breath mint?

Hans: The following people are to be released from their captors : In Northern Ireland, the seven members of the New Provo Front. In Canada, the five imprisoned leaders of Libert? de Quebec... In Sri Lanka, the nine members of the Asian Dawn movement...
Karl: Asian Dawn Movement?
Hans: I read about them in Time magazine.

Gail Wallens: Dr. Hasseldorf, what can we expect in the next few hours?
Dr. Hasseldorf: Well, Gail, by this time the hostages will be going through the early stages of the Helsinki Syndrome.
Harvey Johnson: As in Helsinki, Sweden?
Dr. Hasseldorf: Finland.

John: Drop it, dickhead. It's the police.
Tony: [calmly] You're not going to hurt me.
John: Oh, yeah? Why not?
Tony: Because you're a policeman. There are rules for policemen.
John: Yeah. That's what my captain keeps telling me.

John: You would have made a pretty good cowboy yourself, Hans.
Hans: What was it you said to me earlier? "Yippie-kay-yay, mother****er."

[Last lines]
John: Merry Christmas, Argyle.
Argyle: Merry Christmas. [To himself] Man, if this is their idea of Christmas, I gotta be here for New Year's!

  »   More Quotes from
  »   Back to the