Die Hard

Die Hard quotes

60 total quotes (ID: 161)

Hans Gruber
John McClane
Other


Theo: [Over the CB, as the police SWAT team closes in] Alright, listen up guys. 'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring — except for the four assholes coming in the rear in standard two-by-two cover formation.


Sgt. Al Powell: The man is hurting! He's alone, he's tired, he hasn't seen diddly squat from anyone down here... and you're going to stand there and tell me that he's going to give a damn about what you do to him, if he makes it out of there alive? Why don't you wake up and smell what you shovel'n?

Dwayne: [Watching as Hans Gruber falls to his death from the building] God, I hope that's not a hostage!

Special Agent Johnson: [on phone] Hello, this is Agent Johnson... No, the other one.

Businessman: You don't like flying, do you?
John: What gives you that idea?
Businessman: You want to know the secret to surviving air travel? After you get where you're going, take off your shoes and your socks then walk around on the rug bare foot and make fists with your toes.
John: Fists with your toes?
Businessman: I know, it sounds crazy. Trust me, I've been doing it for nine years. Yessir, better than a shower and a hot cup of coffee.
John: Okay.
[Businessman sees John's gun and reacts]
John: It's okay. I'm a cop. Trust me, I've been doing this for eleven years.

John: You throw quite a party. I didn't realize they celebrated Christmas in Japan.
Joseph Takagi: Hey, we're flexible. Pearl Harbor didn't work out so we got you with tape decks.

McClane: Mayday, Mayday, Emergency anyone copy, Channel Nine, terrorists have seized the Nakatomi Building, Century City, I repeat, unknown number of terrorists, six or more armed with automatic weapons on the thirtieth floor of Nakatomi Plaza.
LAPD Operator: (To other operator) I'll take this.
McClane: Somebody answer me, goddamn it!
LAPD Operator: (Over Radio) This freqency is reserved for emergency communications...
McClane: No ****ing shit, lady! Do I sound like I'm ordering a pizza!?

Convenience Store Clerk: I thought you guys just ate doughnuts.
Al: Heh. They're for my wife.
Clerk: [sarcastically] Yeah.
Al: She's pregnant.
Clerk: Yeah.
Al: Bag it.
Clerk: Big time.

Joseph: You want money? What kind of terrorists are you?
Hans: [laughs] Who said we were terrorists?

Holly: I have a request.
Hans: What idiot put you in charge?
Holly: You did. When you murdered my boss. Now everyone's looking to me. Personally, I'd pass on the job. I don't enjoy being this close to you.

Hans: I thought I told all of you, I want radio silence until further...
John: Ooooh, I'm very sorry Hans. I didn't get that memo. Maybe you should've put it on the bulletin board. I figured since I've waxed Tony and Marco and his friend here, I figured you and Karl and Franco might be a little lonely, so I decided to give you a call.
Hans: Eh, that's... very kind of you, considering you are a mysterious party crasher. You are most troublesome, for a security guard.
John: Bzzzt. Sorry Hans, wrong guess. Would you like to go for Double Jeopardy where the scores can really change?

Hans: Who are you then?
John: Just a fly in the ointment, Hans. The monkey in the wrench. The pain in the ass.

Hans: Mr. Mystery Guest? Are you still there?
John: Yeah, I'm still here. Unless you wanna open the front door for me.
Hans: Uh, no I'm afraid not. But you have me at a loss. You know my name but who are you? Just another American who saw too many movies as a child? Another orphan of a bankrupt culture who thinks he's John Wayne? Rambo? Marshall Dillon?
John: Was always kinda' partial to Roy Rogers actually. I really dig those sequined shirts.
Hans: Do you really think you have a chance against us, Mister Cowboy?
John: Yippee-ki-yay, mother****er.

Dwayne: We don't know shit, Powell. If there's hostages in there, how come no-one's come to us with ransom demands? If there's terrorists in there, where's their list of demands? All we know is that whoever shot your car up is probably the same silly son-of-a-bitch you've been talking to on that radio.
Al: Excuse me, sir! But what about the body that fell out the window?
Dwayne: Well who knows? Maybe some stockbroker — got depressed...

Al: In fact, I think he's a cop. Maybe not LAPD, but he's definitely a badge.
Dwayne: How do you know that?
Al: A hunch, things he said. Like being able to spot a phony ID.
Dwayne: Jesus Christ, Powell, he could be a ****ing bartender for all we know.