The Departed

The Departed quotes

79 total quotes (ID: 158)

Billy Costigan
Colin Sullivan
Dignam
Ellerby
Frank Costello
Multiple Characters


**** you, ****in' queers. Firemen gettin' pussy for the first time in the history of fire or pussy. Hey, go save a kitten from a tree, you ****ing homos!


Costello: Have a seat, Bill. Do you know John Lennon?
Costigan: Yeah, sure, he was the president before Lincoln.
Costello: Lennon said, "I'm an artist. You give me a ****ing tuber (tuba), I'll get you something out of it."
Costigan: I tell you Mr. Costello, I'd like to squeeze some ****ing money out of it.
Costello: Smart mouth. Too bad. If you'll indulge me--
[Gwen walks through]
Costello: Now what?
Gwen: Choir practice.
Costello: Choir practice. The point I'm making with John Lennon is: a man could look at anything, and make something out of it. For instance, I look at you and I think, "What could I use you for?"

Costello: Church wants you on your place. Kneel, stand, kneel, stand. If you go for that sort of thing, I don't know what to do for you. A man makes his own way. No one gives it to you. You have to take it. "Non serviam."
Young Colin: James Joyce.
Costello: Smart, Colin. Guineas from the north and down Providence try to tell me what to do. And, uh, something maybe happen to them. Maybe, uh, like that.

[Upon learning the Police have found Delahunt's body and that he was a cop]
Fitzy: I don't believe it.
Mr. French: What can't you believe?
Fitzy: I spent all ****ing night dragging the poor bastard in there. Tell me how they find him so fast? Somebody walking a ****ing dog ? What ****ing size a dog is that? Has to be a big ****ing dog, man. I spent all night doing it man.
[pause, Frank stares at him]
Fitzy: I'm embarrassed. I still don't believe he was a cop, I don't believe it.
Costello: The COPS... are saying he's a cop... so I won't look for the cop. Are you soft, Fitz? When I tell you to dump a body in the marsh, you dump him in the marsh. Not where some guy from John Han**** goes every Thursday to get a ****ing blow job!
[Fitzy laughs, Frank hits him]
Costello: Don't laugh! This ain't Reality TV!

Madolyn: What do you expect coming in here?
Costigan: I have to come here.
Madolyn: I know you have to come here, but now that you're here, what do you want?
Costigan: You want the truth? Valium.
Madolyn: You know if you lied, you would have an easier time getting what you wanted.
Costigan: What does that say about what you do for a living?
Madolyn: I just think we should have a few more meetings before we even talk about prescriptions.
Costigan: Look... look, I'm having panic attacks, alright? The other night I thought I was having a ****ing heart attack. I puked in a trash barrel on the way over here. I haven't slept for ****ing weeks.
Madolyn: Is that true?
Costigan: Yeah, that's true. Alright? I said it was ****ing true. I want some ****ing pills and you're gonna what? You're gonna close my file? Is that what you're going to do?
Madolyn: No, I didn't close your file. I--
Costigan: I thought I was supposed to tell the truth here, if only ****ing here!
Madolyn: You are! You are!
Costigan: Christ. I mean, a guy comes in here against every, every instinct of privacy and self-reliance he has and what do you do? What do you do, huh? You send him off on the street to score smack, is that what you do? You're ****ing ridiculous!
[Madolyn hands Costigan some Valium]
Costigan: [picking up the pills] Two pills? Great. Why don't you just give me a bottle of scotch and a handgun to blow my ****ing head off! Are we done here with this psychiatry bullshit?
Madolyn: You know what? You can leave!
Costigan: What the **** did I just put myself through? I'm ****ing out of here. And what if that was a legitimate threat? Think about it, ****ing hotshot!

Mr. French: Do you know me?
Billy Costigan: No... No.
Mr. French: Well, I'm the guy who tells you there's guys you can hit and guys you can't. Now, that's not quite a guy you can't hit, but he's almost a guy you can't hit. So I'm gonna make a ****in' ruling on this right now: you don't ****ing hit him. You understand?
Billy Costigan: Yeah, excellent. Fine, fine. Fine.
Mr. French: I ****ing know you. I know your family. You make one more drug deal with that idiot, ****ing cop-magnet of a cousin and I'll forget your grandmother was so nice to me. I'll cut your ****ing nuts off. You understand that?
Billy Costigan: Yeah. Yeah, I do.
Mr. French: What are you drinking?
Billy Costigan: Cranberry juice.
Mr. French: What is it, your period? Get him a cranberry juice.

Bookie: I'm in the hole, I pay him two grand a week! No profit, I pay him two grand a week!
Mr. French: Then make more ****ing money. This is America: You don't make money, you're a ****in' douche bag! Now, what're you gonna do?
Bookie: Make more money!
Mr. French: That's the spirit!

Costello: [about Costigan] Do you trust him?
Mr. French: Well these days, who's reliable?
Costello: His uncle Jackie was. Yeah, you can't trust a guy acts like he's got nothing to lose.
Mr. French: I'm reliable.
Costello: Arnold, you're one in a million.
Mr. French: Ten. Ten million.
Costello: What about your wife, Arnold?
Mr. French: Well, I thought she was.
Costello: [laughing] She wasn't!
Mr. French: Well, she got reliable.
[flashback showing French strangling his wife]

Costello: Good day, father.
Older Priest: Good day, Francis.
Costello: You recall our chat? Little boys. Sucking on their peckers, etc. and so forth. I am as God made me. Is that your rationale? May I remind you - in this archdiocese, God don't run the bingo.
Young Priest: May I remind you - that pride comes before the fall.
Costello: How's Sister Mary Teresa doing? Had a tasty relationship before she took her vows.
[Costello hands the priests a nude drawing of the nun]
Costello: Enjoy your clams, ****s.

Uncle Ed: What's this I hear from Stephanie about you becoming a policeman?
Costigan: You mean Stephanie, who was the only one who came to my father's funeral? That Stephanie?
Uncle Ed: Yeah, that Stepanie.
Costigan: Nothing much to it, Uncle Edward.
Uncle Ed: Are you trying to prove something to the family?
Costigan: When you say "the family," who do mean exactly? You?
Uncle Ed: You always have to question everything, don't you?
Costigan: Maybe it would have done you some good to have some questions from time to time, you know? "Am I an asshole? Are my kids a mess? Is my wife a money-grubbing whore?" I mean, those are questions, right? "Have I ever been good to my dying sister or am I just now pretending to be?"
Uncle Ed: Do you need some money for the funeral?
Costigan: When my mother dies, we don't have any more connection.

Billy Costigan: Well, "Families are always rising and falling in America", am I right?
Capt. Queenan: Who said that?
Billy Costigan: Hawthorne.
Dignam: Pfft! What's the matter, smartass, don't know any ****in' Shakespeare?

[Colin confronts Billy on the rooftop]
Costigan: Freeze!
[points gun at Colin]
Sullivan: Hey! Hey! Hey!
Costigan: Put your ****ing hands up!
Sullivan: Put the ****ing gun down! Put the gun--put the gun down, alright? I came here to talk some sense into you!
Costigan: Hands!
Sullivan: Alright! Just act professional. I can get you your money!
Costigan: What'd you say?
Sullivan: I can get you your money!
[Billy pistol whips Colin, knocking him to the ground]
Costigan: You didn't come here to talk, alright. You came here to get arrested!
Sullivan: You got ****ing tapes of what? Costello was 'my' informant. I was a rat? **** you! Prove it! He was working for me, he was 'my' informant.
Costigan: Shut your ****ing mouth. Come on, get up!
Sullivan: Whoa, what is this? A citizens arrest? Blow me! Alright. Only one of us is a cop here, Bill! You understand that, Bill! No one knows who you ****ing are!
Costigan: Would you shut the **** up?!
Sullivan: I'm a Sergeant in the Massachusetts State Police! Who the **** are you? I erased you!
[Billy slams Colin onto the building]
Costigan: You erased me, huh?
[Points his gun to Colin's head]
Sullivan: Yeah, go ahead! Shoot a cop, Einstein! Watch what happens!
Costigan: What would happen is this bullet would go right through your ****ing head!!
Sullivan: Watch what happens!
Costigan: What, so you can get the parade, huh? The bagpipes and bullshit. **** you, **** you! I'm ****ing arresting you!!
Sullivan: That is the stupidest thing you could do!
[Billy punches him three times]
Costigan: Shut the **** up!!!
[Sullivan falls to the ground]
Costigan: I could give a **** if the charges don't stick, I'm still ****ing arresting you.
Sullivan: [Dazed] Shit.

Costello: I'm going to have my associate search you.
Costigan: No, no one's ****ing searching me. Searching me for what?
Costello: Contra-****ing-band. Take your shoes off.
[French slams Costigan into a chair]
Mr. French: Shoes.
Costello: [to Costigan] I knew your father.
Costigan: Yeah? You know he's dead?
Costello: Oh, sorry. How'd he go?
Costigan: He didn't complain.
Costello: Yeah, that was his problem.
Costigan: Who said he had a problem?
Costello: I just said he had a ****ing problem. There's a man who could have been anything.
Costigan: Are you trying to say he was nothing?
[French slams Costigan onto a pool table and continues his search]
Costello: I'm saying he worked at the airport. Arm.
[French directs Costigan to a pool table, making him hold out his casted arm]
Mr. French: Show me your arm. Flip it. mm-hmmm, mm-hmmm.
[French slams Costigan's arm on the table until the cast breaks, while Costigan screams in pain]
Costello: It makes me curious to see you in this neighborhood. And if I can slander my own environment, it makes me sad. This, uh, regression. Plus, I don't know if it's beyond some ****ing cop prick like Queenan to pull you out of the Staties and send you gift-wrapped to me. I just can't know. I wonder what they do in that particular department, anyway.
[Costello slams on Costigan's broken arm with Costigan's boot]
Costello: [yelling] Are you still a cop?
Costigan: [in severe pain] No!
[Costello whacks his arm again]
Costello: [yelling] Swear on your mother's grave you're still not a cop?!
Costigan: I'm not a ****ing cop!
[Costello whacks his arm again, this time re-breaking it]
Costello: [yelling] Are you going to stop doing coke deals with your jerk-off ****ing cousin?!
Costigan: Yes, yes, yes!!
Costello: Alright, alright. You're okay, you'll be alright. Get your hand taken care of.
[Costello throws down some money]
Costello: I'm sorry, but it was necessary. As for our problem with Providence - let's not cry over some spilled guineas.

Costello: Jeez. She fell funny.
[chuckles at the dead bodies]
Mr. French: Francis, you really should see somebody.

I'm concerned about a Chinaman, who thinks it's wise to come to a business meeting, carrying automatic weapons. Because in this country, it don't add inches to your dick, you get a life sentence for it.