Dazed and Confused

Dazed and Confused quotes

76 total quotes (ID: 152)

Benny O'Donnell
David Wooderson
Don Dawson
Fred O'Bannion
Mike Newhouse
Multiple Characters
Randall "Pink" Floyd
Ron Slater


[on public address system, to junior high students] Okay, all you freshman ****s, listen up! Normally you'd be spending your freshman summer getting your asses busted, and running for your worthless little lives. But today, since we feel so sorry for you, we're gonna make it easy on ya. If you meet us, right here, after school you'll only get one "lick" from each of us. But if you run like cowards, well, it's open season, all summer long, boys. Oh, and Mitch Kramer. Mitchy-Mitchy-Mitchy...We're gonna be lookin' for you, pal. Your ass is gonna be purple by the time this day's over. Have a nice afternoon. [kisses CB mic]


Tony: [describing his dream] So there I am, getting it on with this perfect female body and...
Mike: What?
Tony: I can't say.
Mike: No, you can't give a build-up like that and not deliver. You know, a perfect female body, it's not a bad start.
Tony: But with the head of Abraham Lincoln. With the hat and the beard, everything.

Freshman Girl: Will you marry me?
Dawson: I don't know. What's in it for me?
Freshman Girl: Anything you want.
Dawson: Anything?
Freshman Girl: Anything.
Dawson: [opening his mouth wide] Go like this. [she opens her mouth] Do you spit or swallow?
Freshman Girl: Whatever you...like.
Dawson: Whatever I like? I would definitely marry you.

Cynthia: God, don't you ever feel like everything we do and everything we've been taught is just to service the future?
Tony: Yeah I know, like it's all preparation.
Cynthia: Right. But what are we preparing ourselves for?
Mike: Death.
Tony: Life of the party.
Mike: It's true.
Cynthia: You know, but that's valid because if we are all gonna die anyway shouldn't we be enjoying ourselves now? You know, I'd like to quit thinking of the present, like right now, as some minor insignificant preamble to something else.

Cynthia: The Fifties were boring, the Sixties rocked, and the Seventies..oh god..well, they obviously suck...maybe the Eighties will be radical..

[to Mitch] You know that Julie chick? Loves you. You want her? Gotta play it cool, you know. You can't let her know how much you like her 'cause if she knows, she'll dump you like that [snaps fingers]. Believe me. Like, if she asks you if you want a ride, you say, "No, I've got my own ride, but maybe I'll see you later." Sounds stupid, doesn't it? It works.

Let me tell you what Melba Toast is packin' right here, alright. We got 4:11 Posi-trac out back, 750 double pumper, Edelbrock intake, bored over 30, 11 to 1 pop-up pistons, turbo-jet 390 horsepower. We're talkin' some ****in' muscle.

Dawson: Hey, "Tubs". Catch. Get outta here.
[tosses a freshman a beer]
Benny: What are you wasting a beer on him for?
Dawson: What? It's not a big deal
O' Bannion: Man, this ****ing sucks! Last ****in' day of school, no ****in' party, no ****in' -- Ah!
[throws a beer out of anger]
Benny: You just wasted another ****in' beer.
O' Bannion: Ah, shut up.

Behind every good man there is a woman, and that woman was Martha Washington, man, and everyday George would come home, she would have a big fat bowl waiting for him, man, when he come in the door, man, she was a hip, hip, hip lady, man.

Man, it's the same bullshit they tried to pull in my day. If it ain't that piece of paper, there's some other choice they're gonna try and make for you. You gotta do what Randall "Pink" Floyd wants to do, man. Let me tell you this, the older you do get the more rules they're gonna try to get you to follow. You just gotta keep livin' man, L-I-V-I-N.

You know what, coach. I gotta get going. Me and my "loser" friends, you know, we gotta get Aerosmith tickets. Top priority of the summer. Oh, and coach, uh, I forgot. I might play ball... [throws marijuana abstainance pledge sheet at coach]...but I will never sign that.

Mike: I'm just sayin', if we're gonna go out, if we're gonna drive around, we should just do something.
Cynthia: Yeah, you know, you're right, man. I'm just gonna, you know, get drunk, maybe get laid or start a fight...
Mike: I'm serious, man. We should be up for anything.

Party at the Moon Tower.

Clint: I only came here to do two things, kick some ass and drink some beer. [glances over his shoulder] Looks like we're almost outta beer.

...I wanna dance!