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Dazed and Confused

Dazed and Confused quotes

76 total quotes

Benny O'Donnell
David Wooderson
Don Dawson
Fred O'Bannion
Mike Newhouse
Multiple Characters
Randall "Pink" Floyd
Ron Slater




View Quote Mike: Don't air raid for that bitch, I hate that shit. It's like that Clint ****er in front of all his friends. Huh? Huh, mother ****er?
Tony: Okay Mike.
Mike: Dominant male monkey mother ****er.
View Quote Cynthia: Which one of you had the theory about how president Ford's old football head injuries is affecting the economy?
Tony: Did you know Ford was on the Warren Commission?
Mike: Who cares, he's outta there this fall. Look, we need some alcohol.
Tony: That's a thought.
View Quote Kyle: George toked weed, man?
Slater: Absolutely George toked weed, are you kiddin' me, man? He grew fields of that stuff, man, that's what I'm talkin' about. Fields.
Kyle: He grew that shit up Mount Vernon, man.
Slater: Mount Vernon, man? He grew it all over the country, man. He had people growin' it all over the country, you know. The whole country back then was gettin' high. Lemme tell you, man, 'cause he knew he was onto somethin', man. He knew that it would be a good cash crop for the southern states, man, so he grew fields of it, man. But you know what? Behind every good man there's a woman, and that woman was Martha Washington, man, and every day, George would come home, she'd have a big fat bowl waiting for him, man, when he'd come in the door. She was a hip, a hip, hip lady, man.
View Quote Slater: [continuing his speech about George and Martha Washington] ...and she was real cool too. She'd harvest the crops, man. That's what I'm talkin' about. She'd put it in the bushels and stuff, and sell it, you know, because they had to make ends meet and stuff. I mean, did you ever look at a dollar bill, man? There's some spooky stuff goin' on on a dollar bill, man. And it's green too.
View Quote I love those redheads!
View Quote Hey, hey, hey, hey, watch the leather, man!
View Quote Slater, papers man.
View Quote Im here man...
View Quote Marijuana on one. Reefer on two.
View Quote You know what, coach. I gotta get going. Me and my "loser" friends, you know, we gotta get Aerosmith tickets. Top priority of the summer. Oh, and coach, uh, I forgot. I might play ball... [throws marijuana abstainance pledge sheet at coach]...but I will never sign that.
View Quote If I ever begin to refer to these as the "best years of my life", remind me to kill myself.
View Quote Joint sub-committee on the 50 yard line!
View Quote [looking over Austin, Texas] Would you look at this ****ing town, man? It's dead. Imagine how many people out there are ****in' right now man, just goin' at it.
View Quote I'm letting you have shotgun. But I want you to know it's because only 'cuz I'm goin' inside.
View Quote George Washington was in a cult, and the cult was into aliens, man.