Clueless

Clueless quotes

63 total quotes (ID: 743)

Cher Horowitz
Dionne Davenport
Mr. Wendell Hall
Multiple Characters
Tai Fraiser
Travis


I feel like such a heifer. I had two bowls of Special K, 3 pieces of turkey bacon, a handful of popcorn, 5 peanut butter M&M's and like 3 pieces of licorice.


Cher Horowitz: Lucy, you know I don't speak Mexican.
Lucy: I not a Mexican! [storms out]
Cher Horowitz: What was that about?
Josh Lucas: Lucy's from El Salvador.
Cher Horowitz: So?
Josh Lucas: That's an entirely different country.
Cher Horowitz: What does that matter?
Josh Lucas: You get angry if somebody thinks you live below Sunset.

Cher Horowitz: Hey granola breath, you've got something on your chin.
Josh Lucas: I'm growing a goatee.
Cher Horowitz: Oh, that's good. You don't want to be the last person at the coffee house without chin pubes.

Mel Horowitz: You mean to tell me that you argued your way from a C-plus to an A-minus?
Cher Horowitz: Totally based on my powers of persuasion. You proud?
Mel Horowitz: Honey, I couldn't be happier than if they were based on real grades.

Josh Lucas: In some parts of the universe, maybe not in Contempo Casuals, but in some parts, it's considered cool to know what's going on in the world.
Cher Horowitz: Thank you, Josh. I so need lessons from you on how to be cool. Tell me that part about Kenny G again?

Mr. Wendell Hall: Cher Horowitz: Two tardies.
Cher Horowitz: I object! Do you recall the dates of these alleged tardies?
Mr. Wendell Hall: One was last Monday.
Cher Horowitz: Mr. Hall, I was surfing the crimson wave. I had to haul ass to the ladies.
Mr. Wendell Hall: I assume you're referring to women's troubles and so, I'll let that one slide.

Cher Horowitz: [looks at Dionne's hat] Shopping with Dr. Seuss?
Dionne Davenport: [picks up Cher's backpack] Well, at least I wouldn't skin a collie to make my backpack.
Cher Horowitz: It's faux!

Cher Horowitz: Would you call me selfish?
Dionne Davenport: No, not to your face.

Here's where Dionne lives. She's my friend because we both know what it's like to have people be jealous of us.

Heather: It's just like Hamlet said: 'To thine own self be true.'
Cher Horowitz: Uh, no, Hamlet didn't say that.
Heather: (laughs slightly) I think I remember Hamlet accurately.
Chere Horowitz: (mocks laugh) Well, I remember Mel Gibson accurately, and he didn't say that. That Polonius guy did.

Now could all conversations please come to a halt? And could the suicide attempts please be postponed till the next period?

I would like to say this. Tardiness is not something you can do on your own. Many, many people contributed to my tardiness. I would like to thank my parents for never giving me a ride to school, the LA city bus driver who took a chance on an unknown kid and last but not least, the wonderful crew from McDonalds who spend hours making those egg McMuffins without which I might never be tardy

Josh Lucas: If I ever saw you do anything that wasn't 90% selfish, I'd die of shock.
Cher Horowitz: Oh, that'd be reason enough for me.

Mel Horowitz: You drink?
Christian: No, thanks, I'm cool.
Mel Horowitz: I'm not offering. I'm asking if you drink. You think I'd give alcohol to teenage drivers taking my daughter out?
Christian: Hey, man! The protective vibe. I dig.
Mel Horowitz: What's with you, kid? You think the death of Sammy Davis left an opening in the Rat Pack?

Mel Horowitz: Cher, do you know what time it is?!
Cher Horowitz: Daddy, a watch doesn't exactly go with this outfit.
Mel Horowitz: Where the hell are you?
Cher Horowitz: At a party.
Mel Horowitz: Where? Kuwait?
Cher Horowitz: Is that in the Valley?