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Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory quotes

97 total quotes

Augustus Gloop
Charlie Bucket
Dr. Wilbur Wonka
Grandma Georgina
Grandpa George
Grandpa Joe
Mike Teavee
Mr. Salt
Mrs. Beauregarde
Mrs. Gloop
Veruca Salt
Violet Beauregarde
Willy Wonka




View Quote Veruca Salt: Daddy, I want a squirrel. Get me one of those squirrels, I want one!
Mr. Salt: Veruca dear, you have many marvelous pets.
Veruca Salt: All I've got at home is one pony and two dogs and four cats and six bunny rabbits and two parakeets and three canaries and a green parrot and a turtle, and a silly old hamster! I WANT a SQUIRREL!
Mr. Salt: All right, pet. Daddy will get you a squirrel just as soon as he possibly can.
Veruca Salt: But I don't want any old squirrel! I want a trained squirrel!
Mr. Salt: [wearily] Very well. Mr. Wonka, how much do you want for one of those squirrels. Name your price.
[Veruca smiles]
Willy Wonka: Oh they're not for sale. She can't have one.
Veruca Salt: [her smile drops to an angry expression] Daddy!
Willy Wonka: [imitating Mr. Salt] I'm sorry, darling. Mr. Wonka's being unreasonable.
Veruca Salt: If you won't get me a squirrel, I'll get one myself!
View Quote It's in the fridge, Daddy-o! Are you hip to the jive? Can you dig what I'm layin' down? I knew that you could-- slide me some skin, Soul Brother. ~ To Mike Teavee when showing the children Hair Toffee
View Quote [After the puppet show opening bursts into flames]
Willy Wonka: [clapping] Ha ha ha, wasn't that just magnificent? I thought it was getting a little dodgy in the middle part, but that finale...Wow!
Violet Baeuregarde: Who are you?
Grandpa Joe: He's Willy Wonka!
Charlie Bucket: Really!
Willy Wonka: Good morning starshine, the Earth says hello! [takes out flash cards] Greetings. Welcome to my factory. I shake you warmly by the hand. My name is Willy Wonka.
Veruca Salt: Then shouldn't you be up there? [points to stage]
Willy Wonka: Well, I couldn't very well watch the show from up there, now, could I, little girl?
Grandpa Joe: Mr. Wonka, I don't know if you remember me, but I used to work here in the factory.
Willy Wonka: Were you one of those despicable spies who everyday tried to steal my life's work and sell it to those parasitic copy-cat candy-making cads?
Grandpa Joe: No, sir.
Willy Wonka: Wonderful, welcome back. Lets get a move on, shall we?
Augustus Gloop: Don't you want to know our names?
Willy Wonka: Couldn't see how it wouldn't matter.
View Quote Charlie Bucket: Mr. Wonka, why would Augustus' name already be in the Oompa-Loompa song unless they...
Willy Wonka: [interrupts] Improvisation is a parlor trick, anyone can do it. [turns to Violet] You, little girl, Say something. Anything.
Violet Beauregarde: Chewing gum.
Willy Wonka: Chewing gum is really gross / chewing gum I hate the most. See? Exactly the same.
Mike Teavee: No, it isn't.
Willy Wonka: Uh, you really shouldn't mumble because I can't understand a word you're saying.
View Quote I'm eating the Wonka bar, and I taste something that is not chocolate, or coconut, or walnut, or peanut butter, or nougat, or butter brittle, or caramel, or sprinkles. So I look, and I find the Golden Ticket! [while being interviewed]
View Quote Willy Wonka: Here, try some of this. It'll do you good. You look starved to death.
Charlie Bucket: [Drinks some of the chocolate] It's great.
Willy Wonka: That's because it's mixed by waterfall. The waterfall is most important. It mixes the chocolate. Makes it light and frothy. By the way, no other factory in the world mixes-
Veruca Salt: [interrupts] You already said that.
Willy Wonka: You're all quite short, aren't you?
Violet Beauregarde: Well, yeah. We're children.
Willy Wonka: Well, that's no excuse. I was never as short as you.
Mike Teavee: You were once.
Willy Wonka: Was not! Know why? Because I distinctly remember putting a hat on top of my head. Look at your short little arms. You could never reach.
View Quote Grandma Georgina: You smell like peanuts. I love peanuts.
Willy Wonka: Thank you. You smell like... old people... and soap... I like it.
View Quote Violet Beauregarde: [hugs Wonka] Mr. Wonka. I'm Violet Beauregarde.
Willy Wonka: [freaks out] Oh... I don't care.
Violet Beauregarde: Well, you should care. Because I'm the girl that's going to win the special prize at the end.
Willy Wonka: Well, you do seem confident and confidence is key.
Veruca Salt: I'm Veruca Salt. It's very nice to meet you, sir. [does a curtsy]
Willy Wonka: I always thought a verruca was a type of wart you got on the bottom of your foot. Haha.
Augustus Gloop: [eating a candy bar] I'm Augustus Gloop. I love your chocolate.
Willy Wonka: I can see that. So do I. I never expected to have so much in common. [to Mike] You, you're Mike Teavee. You're the little devil who cracked the system. [to Charlie] And you, well you're just lucky to be here, aren't you? [to their parents] And you must be their...p- p...
Mr. Salt: Parents?
Willy Wonka: Yeah! Moms and dads.
View Quote Mike Teavee: Why is everything here completely pointless?
Charlie Bucket: Candy doesn't have to have a point. That's why it's candy.
Mike Teavee: It's stupid! [Dr. Wilbur Wonka voice-over] "Candy is a waste of time!"
Dr. Wilbur Wonka: No son of mine is going to be a chocolatier!
Little Willy Wonka: Then I'll run away! To Switzerland, Bavaria! The candy capitals of the world!
Dr. Wilbur Wonka: Go ahead. But I won't be here when you come back!
View Quote There's plenty of money out there. They print more and more every day. But that ticket? There are only five of them in the whole world, and that's all there's ever going to be! Only a dummy would give this up for something as common as money. Are you a dummy??
View Quote Charlie Bucket: [about the chocolate factory] But it didn't close forever, it's open right now.
Mrs. Bucket: Ah yes, well, sometimes when grown-ups say "forever" they mean "a very long time".
Grandpa George: Besides, I feel as though I've eaten nothing but cabbage soup forever.
Mr. Bucket: Now pops...
Charlie Bucket: There must be people working there.
Grandma Josephine: Think about it, Charlie. Have you ever seen a single person going into that factory? Or coming out of it?
Charlie Bucket: No. The gates are always closed.
Grandpa Joe: Exactly.
Charlie Bucket: But then, who's running the machines?
Mrs. Bucket: Nobody knows, Charlie.
Mr. Bucket: It certainly is a mystery.
Charlie Bucket: Hasn't someone asked Mr. Wonka?
Grandpa Joe: Nobody sees him anymore. He never comes out. The only thing that comes out of that place is the candy. Already packed and addressed. I'd give anything in the world just to go in one more time and see that what's become of that amazing factory.
View Quote Willy Wonka: THAT pipe... it just so happens to lead directly to the room where I make the most delicious kind of strawberry flavored chocolate coated fudge.
Mrs. Gloop: Then he will be made into strawberry flavored chocolate coated fudge, they'll be selling him by the pound all over the world...
Willy Wonka: No. I wouldn't allow it. The taste would be terrible. Could you imagine Augustus flavored chocolate coated Gloop? Eww. No one would buy it.
View Quote Willy Wonka: People! Those pipes suck up the chocolate and carry it away all over the factory. Thousands of gallons an hour. Yeah. And do you like my meadow? Try the grass. Please have a blade, please do. It's so delectible and so darn good looking.
Charlie Bucket: You can eat the grass?
Willy Wonka: Of course you can. Everything in this room is eatible. Even I'm eatible. But that is called 'cannibalism', my dear children, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies.
View Quote Dr. Wilbur Wonka: I haven't seen bicuspids like these since... since... Willy?
Willy Wonka: Hi Dad.
Dr. Wilbur Wonka: All these years... and you haven't flossed.
Willy Wonka: Not once.
View Quote Violet Beauregarde: What's so funny?
Willy Wonka: It must be from all those dog-gone cocoa beans. By the way, did you guys know that chocolate releases a property which triggers the release of endorphins? Gives one the feeling of being in love.
Mrs. Beauregarde: [flirtily] You don't say?