Vernon: Well, well. Here we are. I want to congratulate you for being on time.
Claire: Excuse me, sir? I think there's been a mistake. I know it's detention, but...um...I don't think I belong in here.
Vernon: It is now seven-oh-six. You have exactly eight hours and fifty-four minutes to think about why you're here. To ponder the error of your ways. [John spits a loogie in the air and apparently catches it in his mouth.] You may not talk. [Brian starts to move to a different seat.] You will not move from these seats. [And he sits back down.] And you... [pulls the chair out from under John's feet] ...will not sleep. All right people, we're gonna try something a little different today. We are going to write an essay...of no less than a thousand words describing to me who you think you are.
Bender: Is this a test?
Vernon: And when I say essay...I mean essay. I do not mean a single word repeated a thousand times. Is that clear Mr. Bender?
Bender: Crystal.
Vernon: Good. Maybe you'll learn a little something about yourself. Maybe you'll even decide whether or not you care to return.
Brian: You know, I can answer that right now sir. That'd be "No", no for me. 'Cause--
Vernon: Sit down, Johnson.
Brian: Thank you, sir.
Vernon: My office is right across that hall. Any monkey business is ill-advised. Any questions?
Bender: Yeah. I got a question. Does Barry Manilow know you raid his wardrobe?
Vernon: I'll give you the answer to that question, Mr. Bender, next Saturday. Don't mess with the bull young man, you'll get the horns.
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