Big Trouble

Big Trouble quotes

60 total quotes (ID: 811)

Arthur Herk
Eliot Arnold
Henry Desalvo
Others


There isn't any rule that says I can't come over here and fart on your entree.


Eliot Arnold: Strip poker. Strip poker. Now, that's a good game.
[Grabs a squirt gun away from Matt]
Eliot Arnold: This is a stupid game.
Matt Arnold: Dad, no offense, but only a moron would mistake that for a real gun.
Eliot Arnold: You could've been killed. And where's your partner in crime?
Matt Arnold: Andrew?
Jenny Herk: He ran the other way.
Eliot Arnold: Did anybody call the police?

[After his son has just called him a loser] Okay, now it's my turn. Up yours, you little shithead. Okay, your turn.

[Whilst watching the chaotic goings-on at Arthur Herk's house] There goes the warranty... and there goes the Iron Chef.

Make her stop, god in heaven make her stop SHE WANTS MY SOUL!!!

[Officer Monica Romero and Agent Greer are in his car, arguing about Russian bombs and missiles]
Officer Monica Romero: Where did they get that stuff?
Pat Greer: Russia.
Officer Monica Romero: Don't the Russians have controls on that kind of thing?
Pat Greer: You'd faint if you knew. A few months ago, somebody got a warhead out of a missile-dismantlement facility in a place called -...
Alan Seitz: Sergijev Posad. Not far from Moscow. Beautiful churches there.
Pat Greer: Anyway, somebody who knew what they were doing modified it. Dumped it on some guys who run a place here called The Jolly Jackal.
Officer Monica Romero: The bar?
Pat Greer: That bar has more AK-47s than Budweiser.

[About Arthur] Arthur Herk. One of the few Floridians who was not confused when he voted for Pat Buchanan.

Henry Desalvo: [back at his table] You go tell your employer it's gonna cost him another 10 G's apiece.
His Boss: Okay. But we want this finished as soon as possible.
Henry Desalvo: Well, believe me, we don't want to spend anymore time in this garden spot than we have to.
Leonard: Got that right.

Leonard: Look at this thing. He's the size of a Buick.
Henry Desalvo: She.
Leonard: She what?
Henry Desalvo: The mosquito is a she.
Leonard: How the hell can you tell that?
Henry Desalvo: Discovery Channel. Only the female mosquito sucks your blood.
Leonard: Sounds like my ex-wife. "Bitch."

[Henry and Leonard are stuck in the middle of a big traffic jam, just right before the Airport Road]
Henry Desalvo: We're gonna miss our flight.
Leonard: You see what the problem is?
Henry Desalvo: I don't know. There's some kind of commotion up there. There might be something about it on the radio.
[He turns on the radio - only to find the two same people arguing on the same phone-in show before turning off the radio in annoyance. After a moment in silence, a goat walks past the car; the two men pause for a moment in stunned silence]
Henry Desalvo: [Disbelieving] Was that a goat?
Leonard: Let's get the hell outta here.

Officer Walter Kramitz: Are you going to help me, or are you just gonna be a big, fat, stupid asshole?
Sour Airport Security Chief: Strip search.

Officer Monica Romero: I'm not gonna arrest you, Matt, unless Mrs. Herk wants to press charges.
Anna Herk: Hey, kids.
Arthur Herk: I want to press charges! Cuff him!
Officer Monica Romero: My hands are kind of full right now, what with holding my dick and all.

John: You can stay.
Puggy: [about the muggers] They took all my money.
John: It's okay. Free beer.

[In the airplane]
Snake: How about we go now?
Airplane Captain Justin Hobart: Sir, we have to finish the preflight checklist. It's for your safety, sir.
Snake: [points to his gun in his hand] I got my safety right here, asshole.

Airport Officer Arch Ridley: [Agent Greer just pushed him up against a support wall] Name's Arch Ridley. Tell me what you need. Please don't kill me.
Pat Greer: We're tracking a couple of scumbags, with one, maybe two hostages and a big metal suitcase. Anybody in this crackerjack system of yours see anything like that?