Batman Returns

Batman Returns quotes

43 total quotes (ID: 62)

Batman/Bruce Wayne
Catwoman/Selina Kyle
Dialogues
Other Characters
The Penguin/Oswald Cobblepot


Just relax. I'll take care of the squealing, wretched pinhead puppets of Gotham!... You gotta admit, I've played this stinking city like a harp from hell!


A penguin is a bird that cannot fly! I am a man. I have a name. [pauses, reluctant to accept it] ... Oswald Cobblepot!

I was their number one son, and they treated me like number two! But it's human nature to fear the unusual. [After visiting his parents' grave]

[to Max] Actually... this is all just a bad dream. You're home in bed. Heavily sedated, resting comfortably, and dying from the noxious pollutants you've personally spewed in a lifetime of profiteering. Tragic irony, or poetic justice? You tell me.

MY NAME IS NOT OSWALD! IT'S PENGUIN! I AM NOT A HUMAN BEING!!! I AM AN ANIMAL!!! COLD-BLOODED!!!

But what it all comes down to is, who's holding the umbrella?!

It's always the so-called "normal" guys that let you down. Sickos never scare me. At least they're committed.

[to Catwoman] Why should I trust some Cat-broad, anyway? Maybe you're just a screwed-up sorority chick who's gettin' back at her daddy for not buying her that pony when she turned sweet sixteen.

Right now, my troops are fanning out across town, for your children! Yes - for your first-born sons! The ones you left helpless at home, so you could get juiced on Max's Shreggnog, and dress up like jerks, and dance, badly!

You killed me. The Penguin killed me. Batman killed me. That's three lives down - you got enough in there to finish me off?! [To Schreck]

I am Catwoman. Hear me roar.

[after Batman hits her] How could you? I'm a woman! [Batman lets his guard down and she attacks] As I was saying, I'm a woman... and can't be taken for granted. Life's a bitch; now so am I.

Honey, I'm home! Oh, I forgot. I'm not married.

They wouldn't put me on a pedestal, so I'm layin' 'em on a slab!

[when an angry crowd throws various things at him] Why is it that someone always brings eggs and tomatoes to a speech?!