As Good as It Gets quotes

41 total quotes

Carol Connelly
Frank Sachs
Melvin Udall
Simon Bishop

View Quote As long as you keep your work zipped up around me, I don't give a rat-crap when or where you shove your show. Are we done being neighbors for now?

View Quote I guess what I'm trying to say is... you make me want to be a better man.

View Quote How can you diagnose someone as having Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and then act as if I had some kind of choice about barging in here?

View Quote Carol the waitress, meet Simon the f**.

View Quote Where do they teach you to talk like that? Some Panama City sailor wanna hump hump bar? Or is this getaway day and a last shot at his whiskey? Sell crazy some place else, we're all stocked up here.

View Quote You don't love anything, Mr. Udall.

View Quote Lucky for you, you're here for rock-bottom. You absolute horror of a human being.

View Quote Well then get in your jamies and I'll read you a story!

View Quote I'm losing my apartment, Melvin. And Frank, he wants me to beg my parents, who haven't called me, for help. And I won't. And... I don't want to paint any more! So the life that I was trying for, is over. The life that I had is gone, and I'm feeling so damn sorry for myself that it's difficult to breathe.

View Quote The best thing you have going for you is your willingness to humiliate yourself.

View Quote If you stare at someone long enough, you discover their humanity.

View Quote Do you miss the tough guy? [imitating Melvin] Well here I am, sweetheart! C'mere ya little piss-ant mop!

View Quote [To Melvin] Come on in, and try not to ruin everything by being you.

View Quote Have you ever let a romantic moment make you do something that you knew was stupid?

View Quote If you ever mention my son again, you will never be able to eat here again. Do you understand? Give me some sign you understand, or leave now. Do you understand me, you crazy ****!