Airplane II: The Sequel quotes

40 total quotes

View Quote Ted Striker: I got a piece of metal. It's a bobby pin.
Murdock: A bobby pin? What the hell is the man doing with a bobby pin?

View Quote Mr. Hammen: I've always loved you darling, but I have to tell you, I was unfaithful to you, just once.
Mrs. Hammen: Oh I understand, darling.
Mr. Hammen: Remember Joan? My first secretary?
Mrs. Hammen: Thats alright, I knew about it all the time. I was unfaithful too.
Mr. Hammen: I understand darling.
Mrs. Hammen: Remember Susan? Your last receptionist?

View Quote Steve McCroskey: Jacobs, what have you got on Elaine Dickinson?
Jacobs: Well, I'm two inches taller, a better dancer, and much more fun to be with.

View Quote Steven McCroskey: Striker? Striker, Striker, Striker!
[a man behind McCroskey strikes a woman]

View Quote [The Wilsons arrive at checkpoint]
Porter: Can I help you folks?
Alice Wilson, John Wilson: Oh, yes, thank you.
Porter: Aw, is that your dog, son?
[looking at Scraps, Jimmy's dog]
Jimmy Wilson: Yes, his name is Scraps, and he's going to the moon with us.
Porter: Oh no. No dogs are allowed in the shuttle son. I'm afraid Scraps will have to be shot.
[pulls out a gun, shoots the dog and the dog falls to the floor]
Jimmy Wilson: [shouts, bending toward his dog] Scraps! He shot him! He shot Scraps!
[Jimmy's parents look horrified]
Porter: Just joking. Blanks, see? Scraps is fine.
[dog stands up and Porter, Alice and John Wilson are laughing]

View Quote Ted Striker: Quick, you must get everybody into the lounge.
Testa: But we don't have a lounge.
Ted Striker: That's not important right now.

View Quote [Ted climbs over the wall guarding the mental hospital, removes his gown revealing his regular clothes and throws the gown out of harm's way. The gown comes back and covers Ted's head. Ted drops the gown beside him and starts to run while trying to avoid being spotted by a searchlight. Ted pauses when he encounters a lounge singer in a spotlight. The singer wears a tuxedo with his bow tie untied and he holds a microphone. It's Jack Jones.]
Lounge Singer: [sings] floats back to you... Ooh, The Love Boat... soon will be making another run. The Love Boat...
[Ted continues to run]

View Quote Ted Striker: We're not in the past or the present anymore, Elaine. This... is the FUTURE.

View Quote Ted Striker: We're going to have to blow the computer!
Elaine Dickinson: Blow ROC?
[a smiling face appears on the computer]

View Quote Terrorists At Beginning of film: Watch your step! [as they help blindfolded victims out of their van]